At some point in our lives, each of us faces the loss of someone or something that means a lot to us.

The result is we feel an emotion known as "grief." This can bring about a long lasting funk in which we operate at sub-par capacity.

What happens when pro sports teams are besieged by grief? In a word, they LOSE more often than they should, until they have worked through grief's distinctive stages.

Dr. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross named five stages of grief people go through following a serious loss. If they succeed in traversing through this difficult journey, they arrive at the fifth stage, "acceptance," and are then able to move on with their lives and careers, sometimes with a greater sense of purpose, resolve, appreciation, and even success.

The Los Angeles Angels lost one of their rookie pitchers in a tragic car crash as the 2009 season just got underway. Understandably, teammates were shaken by this experience, and they played below their capabilities, sinking quickly to the bottom of their division.

The Los Angeles Dodgers just lost their marquis hitter, Manny Ramirez, for fifty games due to his suspension for failing a drug test. His team quickly surrendered their next two games in a row, snapping a record setting series of 13 wins at home to start the 2009 campaign.

If Kubler-Ross's model is correct, what can we expect to see from the Angels and Dodgers as the 2009 season unfolds? She said there are five stages of grief in all, consisting of:

1. Denial
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Depression.
5. Acceptance.

Stage one is the "We don't need him to win" boast. A team consists of a few dozen or more players, so one of them, however potent, doesn't win a championship without a lot of consistent help. Still, a key player like Ramirez affects the entire offense, especially when opposing pitchers realize the full implications of no longer having that dreaded bat coming up against them four times in a contest.

When a team's offensive output stalls, as the Dodgers' did last night, scoring a single run only, the Denial state is over. "Maybe, he is more important to winning than we thought" becomes the perception.

Anger kicks in. "How could he abandon us this way?" becomes the question. This stage ushers in feelings of despondency, but not complete helplessness. Anger is energizing, and it can even lead to fighting back, a flurry of victories, showing the absent, "We can make it without you!"

But reality is relentless, and the losses loom larger. The team starts Bargaining with management to trade for a hitter than can close the gap. Not paying Manny's salary during the suspension "frees-up" seven million dollars, which can go a long way to securing a temporary replacement, or so the argument goes.

But management shifts responsibility back to the players to "Pick up the slack."

Seeing there isn't an easy fix, that their unfortunate condition will persist, and their competitive advantage is compromised, Depression sinks in, and the team experiences a prolonged slump, barely winning a third of its games.

At some point, having plummeted in the standings, the team appreciates what it has been through, accepts that it needs to regroup and redouble its efforts, and begins the slow climb back to respectability and recovery.

Kubler-Ross's model would predict the Angels will make a full recovery, ironically, because the loss of their player to death is conclusive, final. He isn't coming back, and nothing can bring him back.

Manny is scheduled to return, so the grief-work process will be, at best, truncated; less than complete.
This may be a boon or a burden, because in Kubler-Ross's world, there is no returning to the status quo ante.

She studied "death and dying," not resurrection.

Having Manny back may feel temporary, and this could bring persistent anxiety and a fear of future loss.

Like a parent that enters and exits a child's life without any predictability, Manny's presence could do more harm than good, never letting the grief, along with its attendant misgivings, ever completely dissipate.

Manager Joe Torre, in a moment of fairly astonishing intuition, said the "healing process" over Manny's situation, needs to begin. Sadly, that may not occur until the slugger is completely out of the picture.

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